Rejection sucks. Losing sucks. Not knowing why can drive you completely out of your mind. So why worry? Because you’re human.
Kudos to Anne Wayman for once again baring her soul about her being left off the Top Ten Blogs for Writers after occupying that list for two years. Anne stepped outside her own comfort zone long enough to show beginning writers that even we old-timers get fluffed up about rejection now and then. And in true Anne fashion, she follows up with a brilliant lesson-learned post that shows Anne’s gift for teaching amid the personal angst. Give them both a read. Go on, I’ll wait….
Back? Good. It took me the first two or three years of my freelance career to look at rejections as building blocks. It’s tough not taking it personally when it’s the beginning of your career and every idea you craft is sent back with that gawd-awful form rejection letter. But after about 100 (not kidding), I started thinking that each idea was its own separate chance – you know, a sort of ticket in the freelance lottery, only I was applying craft and a modicum of skill to the mix. All the while I read my Writer’s Digest issues religiously and bought writing books and studied how others were doing it. Then it happened – someone said yes.
So how is it all these years later I still get worked up at some rejections? Like Anne’s mini-meltdown, it happens. And it’s okay that it happens. That shows signs of a person who’s human, and one who understands that careers evolve even for those who have tons of experience. And that’s it, you know. Just because we secure a place in line at the freelance buffet doesn’t mean we get to eat everything in sight. Too many yeses make us complacent to some degree, so those nos are real blows to both the ego and the game plan. I still get told no often enough to keep me humble and to make me try harder. Isn’t that a good thing? I have stopped keeping all my rejection letters. Not enough room to store them!
How about you? At what level of your career are you? What’s your ratio of acceptances to rejections these days? Do you keep those rejections? Do you still get all verklempt over them?
It’s hard not to take it personally. I’ve been rejected for projects and been very upset; then the project comes to fruition and I look at it and go, “wow, I’m glad my names’ not attached to that!” Sometimes I worried it was sour grapes, but sometimes I realized that their vision and my writing were so totally opposite we weren’t good matches.
It doesn’t make the moment of rejection any more fun, but one piece in particular, which was rejected by a particular anthology (and the anthology sold VERY poorly) was picked up somewhere else and has opened doors and given me opportunities I’d never have had if it had been accepted by a the poorly received anthology.
Eventually, the rejected pieces find homes that turn out to be far better than the original place of submission.
It still hurts; but now my recovery time is quicker! 😉
Plus, I always have multiple projects out and each project has a market list, so if it comes back, it goes out within 15 minutes to the next market on the list.
Oops – should have been
name’s
not
names’
not enough coffee yet.
oh my, Lori… great way to start my day – I’m on the left coast… thanks so much for your kind kind words… and hello to devon too
A
http://www.thegoldenpencil.com