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The Importance of Confirmation

Posted on by lwidmer

What’s on the iPod: Love the Way You Lie by Rihanna and Eminem Great day yesterday – I put the finishing touches on the web project, got an interview done, and put out my query for the article interviews. Also, I edited a client project that I was happy to have time for. Life is…

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Giving Good Phone

Posted on by lwidmer

What’s on the iPod: Incomplete and Insecure by The Avett Brothers I’m a little behind in what I’m trying to get done this week. The website revisions are turning into more of a rewrite than I’d wanted, but I won’t keep copy that doesn’t sing, so they’re getting a bonus, like it or not. I…

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Four Ways to Find Your Business Voice

Posted on by lwidmer

What’s on the iPod: I’m Shakin’ by Jack White Yesterday wasn’t as productive as I’d hoped. Too many phone conferences. I would love to bottle the time wasted in phoned meetings. While the ones I was part of yesterday were productive (and well run), most are a huge waste of time. I’ve actually worked with…

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Down Under Up Above

Posted on by lwidmer

What’s on the iPod: Super Bass by Nicki Manaj No, that’s not adverb/preposition overload. We had our Aussies over for a four-day visit. We’d met them and instantly clicked at the clan gathering in Inverness (Scotland) three years ago, and when they mentioned they were thinking of planning a trip to the US, we were quick to…

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What Clients Can’t Do

Posted on by lwidmer

What’s on the iPod: Spun by Grouplove The Aussies are here! I’m writing this ahead of time because I expect to be either on my way to Manhattan or to the mountains and some hiking today. I was thinking about the conversation around client expectations during projects or contract negotiations. Any client relationship is one…

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Get in Line

Posted on by lwidmer

What’s on the iPod: Ten Thousand Words by The Avett Brothers It’s quite a coincidence that this song comes up on my iPod right about the time I’m nuts with work. Yesterday was no exception. I worked on four projects, some at the same time, and fielded a phone call on yet another project. I’m…

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Five Things That Could Be Killing Your Business

Posted on by lwidmer

What’s on the iPod: Right in Time by Lucinda Williams I had a productive day yesterday despite a bit of a headache lingering. I finished eight projects for a client and got some preliminary work on another project. Then out of the blue, the big-assed project showed up once again, after much delay. Naturally. As…

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Therapeutic Weekends

Posted on by lwidmer

What’s on the iPod: Innocence by The Airborne Toxic Event “Thanks for making me go, Mom.” Music to my ears, for I drove daughter to work on Friday as she sobbed, apologized, and sobbed some more all the way. Just like the kid on the first day of kindergarten, she was fine when she went…

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Guest Post: Why You Can’t Find Higher Paying Work

Posted on by lwidmer

Amen for friends. As I was busy dealing with my daughter’s illness, a note came in from Samar Owais. She and I had talked about her writing a guest post for a while, and there it was when I needed it most. Thank you, Samar. Your timing is excellent. I swear I didn’t ask Samar…

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Watching

Posted on by lwidmer

It’s going to be a long day. I don’t have a ton of work, and maybe that’s for the best right now. My youngest is going through some pretty crippling anxiety, and I’m loathe to help her. It’s different when it’s physical. You get to a doctor, you get a diagnosis, meds, and hopefully things…

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  1. Kimberly Ben Avatar
    Kimberly Ben

    Oh, Lori. You and your daughter are in my thoughts and prayers. I know what you mean about the frustration of mental illness – there's no physical manifestation of the deep and crippling pain, but it's there. It's so very hard to watch a loved one struggle to pull themselves out of that very dark hole. I'll be sending LOTS of positive energy your way.

    Reply
  2. Lori Avatar
    Lori

    Thanks, Kim. That's exactly how it feels. She struggles to feel normal and I ache for her.

    Reply
  3. Ronda Avatar
    Ronda

    I echo what Kim says…good thoughts, prayers, and positive energy all offered up for you and your daughter.

    Reply
  4. Sandy Avatar
    Sandy

    Oh Lori, my heart just aches for your daughter. Keeping her and your family in my thoughts and prayers.

    Reply
  5. Jake P Avatar
    Jake P

    Hang tough, LW. More thoughts & prayers headed your way from AZ.

    Reply
  6. Gabriella F. Avatar
    Gabriella F.

    I'm so sorry to hear about your daughter's struggles. I don't have first-hand experience with it. But a friend's young son–who's wonderful–already has anxiety that's affecting his life, and it's just heartbreaking to see. You wish you could fix things–especially for such a great person. But it's not that simple.

    On the bright side: being your own boss allows you to take the time needed to help your daughter. Thank goodness for that.

    My thoughts are with you and your daughter, Lori. If there's anything any of us can do, I'm sure I speak for everybody in saying, please ask.

    Reply
  7. Cathy Miller Avatar
    Cathy Miller

    Lori, add my thoughts & prayers to the chain. My younger brother had a traumatic brain injury when he was 15. He was hit by a tree in a horrific storm and was not supposed to live through the night. Those who do not know him, do not understand his struggles. It's difficult to see the body of an adult and understand the need is often that of a child.

    Strength to you both.

    Reply
  8. Paula Avatar
    Paula

    Count me in with the long-distance support and prayers for your daughter. I'm glad she's got you in her corner.

    What disturbs me is people who still view anxiety, depression and other mental health issues as a sign of weakness when it's simply a different type of health issue. I remember several elections ago when a presidential candidate admitted to being treated for depression and the opposition used his admission against him. They painted him as weak when it took strength for him to seek treatment (and more strength to be so open about it).

    I hope your daughter is feeling better soon.

    Reply
  9. Anne Wayman Avatar
    Anne Wayman

    Add my hugs for you and your daughter and thank you for breaking silence…

    There is no shame in mental illness although I'm surprised to find some still think it should be hidden.

    Reply
  10. Lori Avatar
    Lori

    Thank you, everyone.

    Update: she's eaten and has slept. The crying has stopped, at least for the last few hours. I'm doing what I can to bring her down out of her thoughts and back to earth. Foot massages, showers, giving her banana smoothies to keep her energy up are helping. Plus temporary medication to keep the anxiety at bay isn't hurting. She's heard from her new company and they're very understanding and concerned. That relieved a ton of pressure.

    Ronda, Sandy, Jake – Thank you. It helps to know there are prayers coming her way.

    Gabriella, it is tough, isn't it? There seems to be no trigger for the meltdown (though I'm certain there was one), which is so strange. She was great on Sunday. A little queasy and sick on Monday, but she thought it was the pizza she ate. I was sure it wasn't and that she was worrying. But her mood was still very positive. It was positive until this morning, when she just couldn't get beyond the sadness.

    Cathy, that's terrible. I'm sorry your brother has so much to deal with. Much love to him and you.

    Thanks, Paula. I think that's where she's stuck — thinking she'll be judged. So what? If she had a broken leg, would they judge her? If so, those are people not worth knowing.

    I somewhat remember that. Depression is not something you see coming or can control. It's a chemical imbalance and it needs to be fixed just like a physical ailment.

    Anne, very true. There's no shame in having a mental illness. It may actually be easier to treat than some physical ailments, depending on the severity. I suspect after a few weeks, she'll be sorted and feeling better. Her willingness to get treatment (she called doctors before even telling me she was anxious) is commendable.

    Reply
  11. Devon Ellington Avatar
    Devon Ellington

    My thoughts are with you. Let me know what I can do.

    Reply
  12. Fi@Inspiration2Dream Avatar
    Fi@Inspiration2Dream

    Lori, so sorry to hear about your daughter. I've been through anxiety myself and have a son who cops it fairly hard sometimes.

    Many years ago when I was facing my own demons, my therapy group recommended the book 'Living with IT' by Bev Aisbet. It was one of the easiest to read books as a young adult and it really made sense.

    Bev now has a website http://www.bevaisbett.com/index.html. Someting that didn't exist all those years ago, but might be worth checking out also.

    I guess the biggest thing is realising both you and your daughter are not alone – by talking about these things it's amazing how many you discover have been touched by anxiety or depression or have stories to share and help you through.

    I'm sending you and your daughter lots of cyber hugs

    Reply
  13. Wade Finnegan Avatar
    Wade Finnegan

    When it's your child it is the most difficult. You just want to fix it no matter if they are 5 or 25. I commend you for posting this situation. We are human beings that have lives and when put into perspective you realize how far down the scale writing is. Hang in there and ask for help if you need it. We all need support. Take care, Lori.

    Reply
  14. Wade Finnegan Avatar
    Wade Finnegan

    When it's your child it is the most difficult. You just want to fix it no matter if they are 5 or 25. I commend you for posting this situation. We are human beings that have lives and when put into perspective you realize how far down the scale writing is. Hang in there and ask for help if you need it. We all need support. Take care, Lori.

    Reply
  15. Lori Avatar
    Lori

    Devon, I appreciate the love. Thank you, dear friend.

    Fi, thank you. I'll definitely pick up that book and visit her website. I'm glad for people like you who share such valuable resources, and your own experience. Much appreciated.

    Wade, thank you. It's true — when it's your child, you want to fix it. You walk that fine line between trying to hug it away to trying to be strong so they'll maybe feel strong, too. We're fortunate — she saw it coming and called her doctor immediately. I'm glad she's in touch with her mental self. It makes healing that much easier.

    Tough road ahead, but it could be so much worse. I'm grateful to you all for the love, prayers, and healing thoughts. I'll keep you updated.

    Reply
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