I Fought the Lawn and the Lawn Won
Let me tell you how badly I used to get poison ivy when I was young – I remember my arms wrapped in gauze and the bottoms of my feet swollen and aching. I remember having fevers and I remember rashes so thick it was solid on all parts of me. I remember also a particular remedy of a now-gone neighbor; he mixed some concoction that included vinegar and some type of embalming fluid used in taxidermy. We’d dab it on, dance and scream for an hour, but inevitably that rash would be mending by morning. We were probably burning holes in both our skin and the ozone, but when you itch that badly, you want relief and you’re going to try anything. My own mother uses straight Clorox she applies with a QTip. No thanks. Tempting, given the awful itch, but no thanks.

Two days ago, I woke up with it. I should’ve seen it coming, for who can work in the garden doing major weeding and revamping and not expect a little? Alas, after one day, I woke this morning to new areas of discontent. I’ll say right here – I use a product called Zanfel, which is absolutely life saver. It kills the itch and heals the rash. However, if the rash has yet to appear, it’s probably not going to help, as I found out this morning.

I have one thing to do today and then I’m taking a sick day. Meanwhile, if you have any remedies that don’t include taking vitamin C until diarhhea results; coating myself in buttermilk; burning my skin with various chemicals; Technu (I use it, but Zanfel works better for me); or steroids, please let me know. I think I have the two-day-old stuff licked, but the new stuff is something I’d rather not live with, either.

Next week, I’m going to start a series of posts aimed at the true beginning writer: How to write query letters, where to find the work, what to look for (and avoid) in contracts, etc. Stay tuned!