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Mourning the Loss

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I remember the first time I stumbled on Tess Gerritsen’s blog. I was jumping from link to link through other writers’ blogs when I landed on this warm, personable, honest little blog about the life of a published writer. I’ll say right here – I didn’t know Tess’ name until I found that blog, so I came to know her through her own words, not her published works. I linked to her almost instantly, for this was a woman with a sense of humor and a self-deprecating nature – two of my favorite attributes in a person.

This week, however, Tess’ blog is silent and will remain so. Tess is fine: no worries there. But her honesty was a bit too much for some folks and she felt the wrath. I’m not here to say whether she deserved it or didn’t. Everyone has their own threshold of what is acceptable/unacceptable. My opinion is she did nothing wrong and others have misconstrued her words. That opinion is not held by others.

As happens in blogs, the discussion continued elsewhere. Words were not minced, feelings hurt, misunderstandings exacerbated, and now one of my favorite sites (and people) is silent as a result.

I hate this. It’s a current problem in the media, too. Someone says something considered unpopular or politically incorrect and all hell breaks loose. Deservedly or not, we hang people out to dry and forget to notice anything else about them.

Because of the backlash, Tess has decided to hang up blogging. I didn’t post any of the blogs in question where she was taken to task. I don’t want to promote or propogate retaliation in any way. So please, don’t add fuel to the flame. But do mourn the silencing of another voice, and please do look at how it happened, why it happened, and how we can maybe go forward with a more forgiving attitude toward our fellow man.

End of soapbox.

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6 thoughts on “Mourning the Loss”

  1. Matthew C. Keegan says:
    April 22, 2008 at 9:16 am

    Ugh. What a shame. Though it has been some time since I had a full fledged battle on one of my blogs, I know I would never hang things up due to something that I said.

    Even if Tess was wrong, she has every right to express her thoughts and, if an apology was necessary, to voice that and have it accepted. The latter is often what is missing, but I would probably continue blogging anyway.

  2. Lori says:
    April 22, 2008 at 12:00 pm

    That’s my view as well, Matt. It’s a phenomenon that occurs online quite a lot. The Internet is a medium in which we can voice our opinions. Oftentimes, the opinions just continue endlessly as each person adds. Soon, things become distorted, or nasty words are written…. I’ve been victim of it, and I’m sad to say in a few cases I may have added to it.

    What’s more disturbing is this type of reaction is happening in the media. A celebrity makes an errant comment – albeit a stupid or callous one – and the career is ended because there are too many people unwilling to forgive. I can think of any number of instances in the past 12 months alone where celebs or others in the news have been hung out to dry – perhaps deservedly so – and that one mistake or one misstep erases decades of good.

    There’s something inherently wrong with that.

  3. Marijke Durning says:
    April 22, 2008 at 12:38 pm

    How sad. I didn’t know about her blog until I read this and I went to check it out.

    I don’t know what was said or why, but as long as we’re not inciting violence, we should have the right to say what we want, whether people want to hear it or not.

    Sad.

  4. Lori says:
    April 22, 2008 at 1:51 pm

    That’s my view too, Marijke. I do hope she returns. Her blog was always insightful and entertaining. You really got a sense of who she is as a person – not as a writer so much. It was almost like a view into the world through the eyes of someone still wide-eyed over the experience. 🙂

  5. Bob Younce at the Writing Journey says:
    April 22, 2008 at 7:08 pm

    What amazes me, Lori, is that people can’t seem to debate anymore without making things personal. Is it the anonymity afforded by the Internet? I used to think so, but I see it more and more in person, as well.

    I remeber so many debates in college about every subject under the sun. Back then, we talked through ideas daily, and it rarely degenerated.

    (oof, that last paragraph makes me sound old.)

  6. Lori says:
    April 22, 2008 at 8:44 pm

    Oh Bob, that’s so true. Perhaps it’s the influence of our political counterparts? :))

    I do sense the Internet does contribute to it in some way. We’re becoming more brazen in our attempts to be heard, and that certainly has to wash over into real life, too.

    As to how “old” you sound – I listened to a man at the polling place today lamenting about how he’d just turned 40 and his eyesight was failing him. I just looked at him and said, “I sort of remember 40.” ;))

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