Refining Your Freelance Message

Sometimes these posts just write themselves.

I was in the company of someone a few months back who’s a real talker. Mind you, I like a good conversation, and I love hearing other opinions.

What I don’t love, nor does anyone else beyond theater and the comedy circuit, is a monologue. And no one loves a monologue from someone who is addicted to patting themselves on the back.

Amid all the name-dropping (this person actually refers to a friend as “(Name), the famous inventor.” On every mention) and the overuse of the same adjectives (the best, world-renowned, the most talented), I realized just how we as writers can quickly turn off our own audience.

We kill them with overstatement.

It takes just an hour of listening to someone overstate everything (literally, everything) to drive that point home.

Here’s how we’re doing it with our client-facing messaging:

Using weasel words.

I work with a client that has no time for words like “premier” or “leading” in any of their copy. It’s why I love them — they realized that these are words that are overused to the point of having no impact whatsoever. They’re weasel words that sneak into copy as fillers, but they deliver no value.

Showing, not telling.

“Our company has been in business for 34 years, and we’ve won three awards from our community press. We can do the job for you!”

What does that tell you about the company? Two things — that they’ve been around for a few decades, and that they have no idea how to advertise. Why should you care? More to the point, why should any potential client hire you if you’re giving them your resume instead of how you can help them?

Overdoing it.

I cannot tell you the number of hours spent enduring the overstatements and easily debunked claims that the person in front of me was delivering. I stopped listening, stopped making eye contact, stopped engaging after the first 20 minutes. Unfortunately, the person must not have been the best at reading body language, for the onslaught continued. Sadly, this is a good human who has no ability to filter. But even that goodness is trumped by the continued behavior.

If I’m not able to overlook or get beyond such overstatement from someone who is familiar to me, how are you going to convince strangers that you’re really just a good person who’s trying too hard to impress with excessive overstatement?

Falling in love with our own words.

That’s the disease that cannot be cured without some serious reflection. Even when someone tells us the writing is trite, we say something like “But I love that sentence!”

More than you love getting work? If yes, knock yourself out, for you may not be in this business for long. If not, change things.

Those are just some of the sins we writers commit without realizing it. So here’s how to fix it:

Shift the focus off you and onto your potential clients.

[bctt tweet=”Here’s how to write your new marketing copy: lose the word I from your vocabulary.” username=”LoriWidmer”]

It’s not about you, except when it’s showing the client how you are the right person to fix their problem.

Examples:

With over 13 years of experience in writing for the automotive industry, I deliver specialized industry insight to your auto blog.

My 8 years of marketing writing can help you better target your next white paper, case study or customer-facing communication initiative. 

Sandy’s expertise in the fabric industry has helped her Fortune 500 clients retain market share and expand their name recognition.

In each example, the client can see briefly the writer’s qualifications, but can also see where it can be applied to their needs.

Writers, what examples of messaging-gone-wrong have you seen? Any particular advertising that bugs you?