What’s on the iPod: The Cave by Mumford and Sons
I thought that when I became a freelancer I’d be well rid of people jockeying for a higher position. You know the ones – the office folk who make your ideas sound like theirs, who step in and attempt to sound like the expert on the idea you just proposed, the person who delegates to YOU when they hold the same position or lower. You can’t blame them for wanting to appear to own the job they want, but if they’re casting the shadow on your abilities, that’s totally not cool.
Like I said, I thought I’d be well rid of that behavior. Alas, over the years I’ve found that even in freelancing there are those who want the spotlight, crave the attention, and would sell their mothers on eBay if they thought it would drive traffic to their blog. And it baffles me. If you go out of your way to discredit or steal the spotlight from another freelancer, why? I can’t understand it. It may speak to someone’s inability to trust in their own value or their own talents. Or it could be old-fashioned jealousy. Who knows?
But oh, the things I’ve seen:
The Pseudo Originator. It’s happened on other blogs and on this one – visitors who feel compelled to straighten us out or in one odd case, take someone else’s words and repeat them back, making the idea sound like that poster’s original thought. I remember one particular poster who posted directly after I did, rephrasing everything I’d said and adding one of those “No, Lori, THIS is more to the point.” Actually, it was the SAME point.
The I’m-the-one-you-should-be-asking Expert. This one is so strange, but it’s happened a few times. Blogger puts up a post outlining an idea or original thought. Commenter comes along and treats the blogger’s post like a comment asking for help – and then proceeds to dish out help on a topic that may or may not be related to what the original post was about. And of course there are links to that person’s blog. Usually the comments are long and contradictory in some way to the original post. It’s probably the one I see less frequently, but when I see it, it stands out as someone showboating, someone who can’t allow another person’s experience to trump their own (in their mind). And it’s a totally different feel than those who post contradictory or long advice that’s relevant. You’ll know it when you see it.
The Blog Pimp. Never fails – you get a good dialogue going, one that’s actually helping someone, and up pops the Blog Pimp. You get a response that says something like “Wow! I blog about this ALL THE TIME, and here are the links…” That’s not to say sharing relevant links, even to one’s own blog, is bad. It’s not. It’s bad only when it’s done constantly or isn’t really helpful.
I’m thankful none of these types hang out here. Can you imagine how that would alter the atmosphere?
What attention seekers have you seen? How can you distinguish between someone who’s being blunt and helpful and someone who’s trying to gain an advantage of some sort? Have you had one or more of these people on your blog ever?
8 responses to “The Politics of Freelance”
I was wondering how long it might be before you broached this topic, Lori. Weren't we discussing at least one of these types before your big Irish adventure?
Blog pimps are the most irksome to me. It's stealing the thunder from the blog or group you're commenting at without adding any meaningful contributions.
There is another sub-category. It's not quite the "I'm-the-one…" you mentioned, but close. I'm talking about the people who post under the pretext of offering helpful advice, but really do it to toot their own horns. I've seen a lot of what I'd consider fairly inexperienced freelancers trying to position themselves as all-knowing oracles of the freelance world. Most don't have the credentials or clips to back their claims.
You know the type: I'm the highest-paid writer ever; What recession? I'm turning away clients by the drove so you must be doing something wrong!; clients bow to my every demand because I'm the best. They usually follow up by directing people to their blog or to a website where they can purchase their e-books or hire the self-professed "expert" to be their writing coach.
Those overly aggressive types need to learn when and where self-promotion is appropriate before their hard sell tactics backfire and drive people away. Some smack of such desperation that I get the feeling they're actually trying to convince themselves they're successful professionals.
I think one of the challenges with blog etiquette is that it's largely common sense. Most polite people would instinctively recognize those as ham-handed attempts as self-aggrandizement. (Ultimately, you'd like to think they're self-defeating, too.)
On a related cultural note, my wife and I took note of the percentage of kids who said "thank you" upon receiving candy last night. I took solace in the parents with wee ones who coached them to say thank you — those are the kids for whom politeness will eventually be second nature when they're on their own.
Cyber-Gremlins have eaten my comment again. Unless, of course, I managed to comment on some other post, in which case it would make no sense. I don't remember much of what I said. I do remember what I mentioned about the expert part of the post.
I so agree about that. What I really hate, though, is when I see a post of a blogger's opinion about something and a commenter saying, "Obviously you haven't read the article. If you had, you would know…" Please, no condescending tones for someone who is only stating an opinion. I won't take you seriously. Like you say, it's okay to disagree, just don't be an a*s about it.
Hi Lori, always figured the pimp was actually spam comments… put there semi automatically… I delete them. Maybe I'm wrong – happened a couple of times already even today.
Welcome back Lori.
I think you already know one of my "favorite" attention-whore types in the blogosphere. They're the ones who hear that you'll be covering something, and suddenly had the same idea (publishing before they know you will). Once in a while I like to pre-write posts for my blogs and announce on Twitter what's coming up the following day. Lo and behold, so-and-so suddenly decides to write about the same thing (repeatedly — so no chance it's a simple coincidence).
The worst is when it's a blogger who already gets a lot of attention. They're too unoriginal to come up with their own material, and they're happy to take the opportunity to make you look bad (as though you're parroting them) while they play the "I was first" game. I at least can take solace in the fact that their content usually pales in comparison — that's what happens when you rush something out just to be first instead of thinking before posting. I suppose that's just another type of Pseudo Originator.
Of course there's always the self-proclaimed martyr attention-seeker type too. You know the ones. Every other post or comment has some "woe is me" element or some attempt to validate their existence. Because, of course, everything you say must be about them. Fortunately readers usually pick up on that pathetic form of attention-seeking eventually. Unfortunately, often not fast enough.
Oh, and let's not forget the kiss-ass attention-seekers either. For them it's less about commenting to promote their links and such to your readers. It's more about getting your attention (or when reading other blogs you'll notice it's all about getting the attention of that better-known blogger). These are often the users. They want to ride others' coat tails, and in the process they tend to get in the way of actual constructive conversations. The blogger might not always mind. But it can be a big annoyance to other readers and commenters on the blog.
Hey, Lori.
I don't have a comment on the obnoxious posters (geez, I hope you're not thinking of me!), but I did run into a somewhat related situation yesterday–an attention-seeking source.
Color me stunned to stumble across a lawyer's bio yesterday in which she listed an article I wrote among her published works, adding that she'd co-authored it with me. Whah?!
I was furious. I wrote her a polite email saying that I was surprised, that she was one of five sources, not the writer, and that I'd like her to take the reference down immediately.
She responded toot sweet saying sorry, that she didn't know it was there, gosh, who in the marketing department put it there?!
Makes me wonder how many other freeloaders there are trying to promote themselves off our work.
Gabriella, fear not. I would never write anything negative about you or anyone else who visits here. You're my peeps. 🙂
That's pretty insane! A lawyer, who should know better, pulling something illegal – I hope you told her in no uncertain terms you didn't care who put it up, but she's the gatekeeper and she's responsible for anything bearing her name. What a putz to think she could get away with that!
Paula, exactly. I hear so many people with the "You MUST do it MY way because I'm so smart I can't fail!" attitude. Ridiculous. Luckily, there are few of these and many more helpful people.
Jake, I suspect you're right. Those who think independently would smell the self-promotion within seconds. In one case, I did within two comments from a particular poster. There are enough people waiting to follow someone to feed those egos, but count me out.
Glad to hear there were polite ghosts and goblins at your door. I was surprised that all kids who showed up here would say things like "thank you" and "have a happy Halloween" without a parent in sight.
Anne, it's a little worse. Some are regular commenters sometimes who have their own blogs. Like I said, it doesn't happen often, but it happens. I'm inclined to ignore them, but there are newbies who may be led down the wrong path if they're smitten. I remember one a number of years ago who touted success at every turn while asking me for money via email to pay utility bills because this person was broke.
Jenn, that's true. It's prett sad when you see someone so self-absorbed that they believe every post HAS to be about them. Carly Simon's song fits, doesn't it? 🙂
Gabriella — Wow. You'd think a lawyer of all people would know better. And highly suspect that a marketing person would just assume they authored something without the lawyer saying or at least implying it. Yuck. Glad it's taken care of though.
Lori – The writer you mentioned in response to Anne — total piece of work. Vanishing degrees (and income). Quite a trick to pull off when you're also busy screwing over your own contractors. I still wonder what happened to that one sometimes. Funny how those types of attention-seekers eventually quit or at least fade away a bit once they've been called out for their BS. Sometimes it's just a case of different styles not working for everyone, and that's okay. But when it comes down to blatant dishonesty, they get what they deserve eventually.