Writers Worth: This Job, Not That Job

Oh, FFS.

Maybe job posters haven’t read yet about The Great Resignation. Maybe they think that writers are really that damn desperate for work that they’ll work for pennies. Literal pennies.

Such is the assumption one hapless job poster has made in this job sent to me by Paula Hendrickson. The assumption is that we’re just tripping over ourselves and each other to write for someone who requires plenty of expertise but can’t quite see their way to paying a fair — or even remotely decent — price for that expertise.

Without further delay, I give you this installment of This Job, Not That Job.

Do you LOVE dogs? Are you passionate about helping dog owners make better nutritional decisions for their pets?

Then we need you.

We’re building the world’s best resource on canine nutrition and we’re looking for one more experienced writer to join our team.

It’s important that you understand the science behind dog nutrition and possess strong research skills. Above all else, it is crucial to have the crucial sense to make decisions about how dog food products compare to each other.

…..

Our team has extensive experience growing successful blogs, with multiple exits under our belts. We have an aggressive investment roadmap for this project we’d be thrilled to have you along for the ride.

As an established media company, this project will be backed up with over 30 years of combined marketing knowledge from our team and an investment roadmap that will allow for sustainable, long-term content production. That’s to say: we’re in this for the long run!

This means we can offer stable and consistent work for the foreseeable future as we continue to scale the site.

You’ll have a platform to put forward your ideas and have your voice be heard. You won’t simply be a faceless freelancer. You’ll be part of the team.

We’ve run dozens of successful blogs and know what it takes to make content successful. We’ll give you detailed, actionable feedback on your writing, and work as a team to improve our work together.

Requirements

• Interest in dog nutrition
• Excellent research skills
• Ability to write at least 8k words per week

Benefits

• A consistent, reliable source of work
• Competitive rate of 6c per word
• Prompt, regular payments from a reputable, longstanding business
• Ability to take on more work, if you so desire.

Oh boy. They hit all the hot buttons with this one.

Let’s start with the obvious —

[bctt tweet=”6 cents a word is NOT a competitive rate. #freelancewriting” username=”LoriWidmer”]

Competitive rate of 6c per word

But of course they save that tidbit for the bitter end, when they believe their emotional pleas and “be your own boss” style bullshit has already hooked you.

They don’t know you very well, do they?

But let’s unpack the bullshit just in case some new or unaware freelance writer hasn’t quite gotten the memo on shlock like this.

Do you LOVE dogs? Are you passionate about helping dog owners make better nutritional decisions for their pets?

Then we need you.

Please. I LOVE dogs, and who doesn’t want to help people make better decisions. But look at that next line: “… we need you.” Oh my hell. They NEED YOU. YOU are the very person who can save dogs from their hapless owners! Egad.

We’re building the world’s best resource on canine nutrition and we’re looking for one more experienced writer to join our team.

It’s important that you understand the science behind dog nutrition and possess strong research skills. Above all else, it is crucial to have the crucial sense to make decisions about how dog food products compare to each other.

As Paula pointed out to me, some veterinarians don’t even understand the science behind dog nutrition. How the hell is a writer being paid 6 bloody cents a word going to be able to do that?

And let’s just talk about that word: “experienced.” You mean to tell me that a writer who is experienced and most likely billing at $1 or more per word is going to be enamored by this emotional plea enough to work for a fraction of that rate?

Also, note the other trigger words: “we’re building” “to join our team.” Translation: They have nothing. And they’re herding writers like sheep. You’ll never be valued there, and I’d bet their “success” is a bloated assessment based on …. ? Are they telling you where their “dozens of successful blogs” are? Are they proving they have the chops to be around “for the long run!”?

Truth? It doesn’t matter. They’re paying practically nothing and you can do better. Hell, a minimum-wage job pays more than this in one hour as opposed to what? Spending a week writing 8,000 words for what? $480? Really?

We’ll not even get into the dangling of “you won’t simply be a faceless freelancer.” Maybe not. But you’ll damn well be underpaid.

Enough.

The good news: For every lousy gig out there, there is a lucrative alternative. Try something like this instead:

Family Fun

FEATURES
Our features present activities that are entertaining for the whole family, relatively
inexpensive, and easy to do. Specific topics include food, crafts, parties, holiday
celebrations, games, creative solutions to common household problems, educational
projects, and home organizing and decorating. Travel features focus on ideas and
strategies for family outings and vacations. Destinations should be moderately priced,
offer exceptional value, and cater to the needs of families. Food features present recipes
that have a track record with families—dishes that are fun both to make and to eat.
Length: 850 to 3,000 words
Compensation: $1.25 per word upon acceptance

Look at that. You can write about more than just dog nutrition — or hey, maybe you can write about pet-friendly family outings. Either way, you write far fewer words for quite a bit more.

Writers, what’s the worst you’ve seen?
Have you ever accepted a gig that paid far less than it should have? How did it work out?
What advice can you give other writers based on that experience?