Words on the Page

a freelance writing resource.

The Successful Freelancer: Improving Your Client-facing Message

What’s on the iPod: Misfits and Lovers by The Wallflowers

It’s Thursday already? What happened to my week? I took Monday off for the holiday that everyone else had. Tuesday was a snow day for my daughter and when she’s home, I tend to play hooky with her (bad habit, in fact). Yesterday I spent the morning finishing a small project and updating some blog content. Today, I’ll continue marketing and get in touch with client prospects and some editors I haven’t heard back from yet. Follow-up, to me, is the best part of marketing. You’re not reinventing the wheel, but rather reminding them the wheel is turning.

About a year ago, I talked with a potential client about revamping a website. I knew I was in trouble when the initial phone call ran over an hour and I couldn’t for the life of me get him to say in one or two sentences what his business was. When he sent over a client article to show me what it was, I was a bit flabbergasted. Shouldn’t this be something the owner knows?

I did my best to improve what was there, but it was an impossible task. The client simply didn’t know what he wanted, what he was about, or if he even wanted to attract new customers (he said it wasn’t his goal).No amount of questioning helped him get to those answers, either.

A no-win situation for any writer.

Yet isn’t that exactly how we freelance writers feel when we sit down to create our own client-facing materials? We either apologize for our existence (“Sorry to bother you” / “I don’t know if you hire people like me”) or we talk incessantly about ourselves (“I love to write, and I have over 10 years of experience in magazines and with clients” / “People tell me they love my work, and I’m in demand, so hurry and book your space with me now!”).

Neither way is going to win over many clients. So let’s rewrite the message so they’ll listen, okay? Here are four ways to get their attention (and keep it):

Show them you know them. 
Probably the best way to get the attention of a new client prospect (and to keep the current clients) is to show them you understand what their goals/concerns/needs are. Here’s an example of messaging that doesn’t quite cut it:
I don’t know if this applies to you directly, but I’ve helped a number of mid-sized businesses write marketing content. I have handled website copy, blog content, and newsletter copy. Maybe you want something like this?

Right. You lost them at “I don’t know if this applies to you…”

Instead, try siding with the potential client:
As I was looking through the latest issue of your newsletter, I noticed…..
or
When you attend the Cardboard Manufacturers Trade Show in six months, consider revamping your marketing materials to get the most impact.

Both of these approaches show you’ve done some homework.

Stop talking about yourself.
Here’s an example of talking at the client:
I built this business out of my passion to help others. I was a founding partner in the top local consulting firm, where I consulted with over 100 companies of all sizes throughout the country. My 20 years of experience includes serving on the board of a Fortune 500 company and handling marketing and sales for that company.

Asleep yet? You should be. That’s all “I, I, I” talk, and it’s not showing the client anything about why the hell they should care.

Instead, turn the focus onto them:

If you could easily retrain your entire company staff to put the customer first, why wouldn’t you? Give your customers the benefit of a great customer experience every time. Let me help you retool your current business model into one that attracts customers and keeps them loyal — all within your budget.

You’ve just appealed to people who want to make more money. Gee, how many do you think that could be?

Simplify the message.
Take this copy, for example:
The purpose of a business is to create and profitably serve loyal customers. We consult with business owners and help them gain clarity about the right things to do to fulfill this purpose and achieve the right results. 


The point is in there, but it’s lost in too many ideas. Ironically, this company’s message of gaining clarity isn’t exactly clear. 
Instead, try this:
Want to improve business results? Start by clarifying your message and purpose. We train you how to get the most from your client interactions by revamping the way you approach your customers.
What’s missing? All those ideas that really didn’t speak to the customer’s needs.
Stop writing laundry lists.
Here’s the wrong way to present your talents:

I would love to help with your blog posts. Also, I have written plenty of newsletters, and I’m used to writing case studies. Oh, and I’ve written articles, which means I can ghostwrite for you, too.


Desperate much? Instead, find a way to say you have a wider range of experience without listing it all:


Whether you need a brochure update or an in-depth, industry white paper, consider the value that professional writing services can add to your next project.

You didn’t list everything, but you gave the impression that there’s a fairly wide range you can handle.

Writers, what’s your favorite way to appeal to clients?
How often do you revisit/revise your messages?
In what ways are you getting your message to clients?

6 responses to “The Successful Freelancer: Improving Your Client-facing Message”

  1. Anne Wayman Avatar

    "Stop talking about yourself" is outstanding advice…

  2. Lori Widmer Avatar

    Thanks, Anne. Too many people oversell themselves, which means they're not focusing on what the clients want or need.

  3. Paula Avatar

    Nice examples, Lori!

    Just this week I encountered a publicist who couldn't define a sentence she herself wrote. I kid you not. So I asked if they had an old press release on that topic she could send to help me better understand what she was trying to tell me about. She said they didn't have a press release, and "that's just what it's called." That's just what WHAT is called?

    Argh. And she's being paid to communicate company information to the press.

  4. Lori Widmer Avatar

    Huh? Paula, put me down under confused right along with you! What she says makes no damn sense.

    It amazes me how some of these people get (and keep) their communications jobs.

  5. Paula Avatar

    Oh – I think she's also the one who sent me an over written PR puff paragraph for me to use. Right. She sent it about 28 hours after my deadline (which was four days after her deadline). When I told her it was too late, she said, "I sent it last night!" Um. Too little, too late, and badly written. I said the best I could do was forward it on to my editor…who may have already edited that guy's entry (my list was alphabetical, and his last initial was high up in the A-B-C portion of the alphabet).

    I guess this struck a chord when I read your post because that publicist tried making everything about her own needs and had no regard for the 30+ other people who managed to get the information in on time, or at least not after I'd turned it it, for me, or for my editors who have a very tight window to edit a massive list.

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