What’s on the iPod: Call Me Al by Paul Simon
What a difference a few hours make.
Monday morning I was in a little funk because I was sitting idle and staring at projects in limbo and projects that were evaporating. By 3 pm, I had one new client and two new projects. Is this job bi-polar or what?
Yesterday was spent on the phone with three clients in various stages of planning, starting, and revising. A good day’s work.
A good while ago, I had to tell a client tactfully that we were no longer going to work together. He’d been paying well, but then the workload morphed into more edits and additions than the compensation I was getting warranted. The problem: we’d parted company and when he returned, he agreed to my higher rates. For some reason, that higher rate sent him into hyper-editing mode, and he began arguing style points (not suggesting changes). In the last email we shared, he’d accused me of making “numerous” grammatical errors. When pressed, he came up with one example. Worse, he was wrong and I had to tell him so without sounding like a snob.
I waited about a week, then I sent him a follow-up note to make sure he was satisfied with the last revision. When he said he was, I sent the invoice, and sent the “breakup” note. A while later, I shared that note with a writer friend, who said “Wow, talk about a velvet hammer.” I somehow managed to thank this client for his business, fire him, and let him know where the problems were without insulting, calling names, or making it anywhere near contentious.
It took practice. And I don’t get it right every time.
Even though firing a client is not a pleasant endeavor, it helps to find a way to do it without pulling out weapons or calling names. That never belongs in your business. Ever. Especially the weapons part, but that kind of goes without saying. I hope.
Be it letting go of a client, pointing out a client mistake, or otherwise tiptoeing through an emotional minefield, there are ways to approach it that can help you make this your best, most professional behavior. Here’s how I get the point across tactfully:
Conjure up some respect. Even in my worst cases of clients behaving badly, I was able to find a modicum of respect for them (even if they didn’t deserve it) by remembering they are people. They’re also doing what they think is best for their business even if they’re failing miserably. If you have to, pretend you’re talking to someone you dearly appreciate while you’re typing.
Don’t make it personal. When I bid adieu to that client I first mentioned, I followed that up with a donation to his charity when he asked (I was still on his mailing list). That’s because I had one issue with him — the work had outpaced the pay. That’s a business issue. Now if he’d told me I sucked and he hated everything about me, I think I might not have donated. Maybe. But I would never have responded to his outburst with anything other than a cordial good-bye. If you filter everything client-related through a business filter, you won’t get caught up in the emotional junk that never belongs in business dealings.
Steer away from negative language. I had learned not long ago that I was no longer part of a client’s project, and I heard via a third party. When I wrote to the client, I did bring it up, but in a way that couldn’t be read as confrontational. No “You never said” or “I had to find out through Jill” or anything like that. It was “I realized” followed by an invitation for feedback and a good-luck-to-you ending. If you pretend the person you’re dealing with is about to hire you and not you about to fire them, it makes it easier to find the right words to use.
Think of future connections. I remember working with a guy for a few days and thinking I’d lose my mind if I couldn’t tell him to shut up and let me alone. I didn’t. I bit my tongue and was cordial with him. Color me shocked when a month later, he referred me to what would become a long-term client. He said he was impressed by my professionalism. Apparently, I’ve become really good at grinding my teeth silently. 🙂 But each person you come in contact with has a network of people. Don’t shut the door to all those connections just because you have an ax to grind.
Do what’s right for you. Someone in the family was having difficulty at work recently, and she gave notice. Her boss was notorious for using emotional pleas to keep her there, and understandably so. She’s a valued part of the company. However, shortly after agreeing to terms she was clearly not happy with, my family member went back to the boss and said it wasn’t working. The result: she managed to keep the job, but did so on her terms, which makes both the boss and her employee very happy. If you’re unhappy with a relationship, say exactly why without pointing fingers or getting emotional.
How successful are you at maintaining that professional business persona?
What has been your best example of staying professional?
What’s the hardest part for you?
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