The “Do Not Think About List” Revisited

Way back in 2013, I wrote about things that unnerve us and that take up too much of our time worrying about, fussing over, or venting to friends about.

In the current political and social environment, it might be time to revisit that list. And update it.

If anyone needs it, it’s me.

I’m addicted to the news cycle these days. What I see astounds me, shocks me, sickens me, and gets me angry. I’m not one who gets that involved in politics, yet here I am doing just that.

We can talk all day about all of it, or we can spend our time doing more productive things.

I’m forced to choose the latter.

Why forced? Because I see what all this “What the hell?” reaction is doing to me. Yes, I’ll continue to stand up for what I believe in, but it shouldn’t be part of every conversation. I’ve chosen my methods for correcting the things I don’t like. I have to stop talking at some point and get other things done.

So the list.

The list is something I thought about doing because I am nothing if not a time-waster. It’s evident just how much time I waste when I have a ton of work and I’m able to get much of it done in “record time.” No, I sat my ass down, turned off Solitaire, stopped surfing Facebook, and did the work.

Busted.

So here’s what I suggest we all put on our “Do Not Think About” list. And that doesn’t mean you can’t eventually think about it. Just put it aside during your work hours.

Political action. Guilty. Very, very guilty. I may hate some of the stuff I see coming out of Washington, but unless I’m writing about it, I need to let it go until after hours. For the most part I do, but I’ve been known to go there on the phone or in forums. In the end, it doesn’t matter right now what you think. It matters how you pay your bills.

Difficult former clients. They’re teaching moments definitely, but conversation fodder years later? That’s not healthy. They’re not in your orbit — don’t invite them back in unless the point is to show other freelancers what to look for and how to avoid it. Then let it go again.

Budgets that don’t match. There’s no point in getting all huffy because your potential client just revealed that his budget is nowhere near your fee. He’s not your client. His money issues are as real to him as yours are to you. Now, if he insults you over your fee, yes, you have a right to get huffy. But what good will it do you? It won’t change anything. I had a client call my pricing outrageous. Yes, he was insulting. Yes, I was steamed. No, I didn’t respond. He wasn’t my client. That doesn’t mean I didn’t stand in front of him at a trade show and watch him sweat a little. His tone and his language are inexcusable. I won’t return the same.

Perfection. Still sitting on that project you’ve been talking about for two or three years? Still waiting to tweak that book one more time, revise that letter of introduction, or learn how to use social media (which is simple — get on social media and say hello)? Stop letting perfection hold you back. You’ll never be perfect. You only need to be good enough. If your client is happy, you should be happy. If you’re afraid to show it to your client, use the “first draft” caveat so you both can ease up on the expectations.

Other writers’ earnings. Stop comparing yourself to those writers who shout the loudest about their six-figure incomes. And stop blaming those who can’t scrape together $20,000 a year. We all have our own levels of ability, availability, fears, you name it. Those shouting loudest are typically skewing their numbers (or supplementing with other work they’re not telling you about). Those who aren’t earning much may be earning all they need to be earning. It’s not for you to say or judge. And it’s not your problem, so learn to let it go.

Phonies. I hate phonies, particularly writers who are phony — and have built careers based on others’ hard work, or who are just lying about it. I can’t stand phony clients who trot out all their new office toys to impress you, then balk at your rate. It doesn’t matter. That writer isn’t your problem, nor are the clients who are clearly not your clients. Let them be phony with someone else. You’re busy focusing on being genuine and being good enough to command your rate.

Writers, what goes on your “Do Not Think About” list?