Writers Worth: Is Fear Getting in the Way of Your Worth?

If life gives us a do-over, I would want to come back as Emily Fowler.

She’s vegan (okay, I’m vegetarian — close). She’s tattooed (I’m too fickle to get a tattoo — what if I change my mind?). She’s pink-haired (this week?). She’s about to be a new mom. And she’s British. Geezuz, do some people get all the luck or what?

She’s also a terrific writer and a wonderful person. And someday, we’ll meet. We came close a few years ago, but my trip coincided with her India trip, so we missed each other by a few hours. And she’s someone I really, really want to meet.

In the meantime, I must settle for sharing her company via virtual means. Today, Emily tells us how she overcame fear and asserted her worth. And while she fears “imposter syndrome” there’s no need — this is a talented writer.

Why We Shouldn’t Let Fear Influence Our Worth

by Emily Fowler

As writers, we have certain fears in common, I’m sure. The fear of a blank page, of losing a regular client, of being told someone hates your work.

No matter what your personality, whether you’re naturally anxious or not, at some point in your freelance writing career, fear is going to have some sort of bearing.

Sorry to break it to you haven’t experienced that fear already – but don’t worry! It doesn’t have to affect your worth, it’s how you deal with that fear that shapes you.

There might be a million reasons for fear to creep into your career, here are three circumstances that affected me personally.

The fear of taking the plunge

I started my freelance writing business in 2013 while still in a full-time job in finance, and left the security of that job after 12 months of working in the office all day followed by evenings and weekends spent writing.

It was exhilarating, liberating, and incredible.

Also, terrifying.

Why did I feel fear?

I’d worked hard to build up a client base, so I knew I had work there to sustain me. I’d also built up a respectable ‘pot’ of savings (albeit not the 12 months I’d planned), so if things did slow down I’d be OK.

Yet I still felt the fear.

I’m sure it’s natural, think about how many employees talk about their passion or their dream for doing something else, for being their own boss. How many actually make that leap and DO it? Probably only a small percentage.

OK, for some people that dream of doing what they love isn’t really what they want to do – but for the majority, I’d guess it’s fear that stops them.

How did I deal with the fear?

I knew that I couldn’t carry on with the hours I was doing, so I only had two choices – leave the day job or give up my dreams of being a full-time writer. There were still moments when I would wake up in a cold sweat in a panic about losing the security and benefits of being a full-time employee, but as you’ve probably guessed by the fact I’m writing this post years later, the good things far outweigh the fear!

The fear of being ‘found out’

At the start of my career I wrote a lot about finance and had plenty of finance and accounting clients, because that’s what I knew, but finance certainly wasn’t my passion – animals were (cats in particular).

I remember speaking to a writer friend who specialised in writing about dogs, about how lucky she was to be able to make a living writing about dogs, and how I’d love to write about cats in the same way IF ONLY THERE WAS THE MARKET and money in it.

As she pointed out, there is the market to specialise in that niche, and that’s when I decided to change my focus and see where it would take me.

Fast forward to today, and while I don’t exclusively write about cats, a high proportion of my work is related to cats and other pets. I write for trade and consumer pet magazines, ghost-write for pet businesses and blogs, do content marketing and copywriting for the pet industry, am a Professional Member of the Cat Writers’ Association, and have a non-fiction book about cats coming out this year with a household name publisher.

I get invited to national pet events and am regularly contacted by businesses in the pet industry wanting to work with me…so why do I sometimes still feel the fear when it comes to new clients and projects?

Why do I feel fear?

There’s definitely a touch of ‘imposter syndrome’ at play with this one.

Despite the fact I’ve been supporting myself and assorted cats for a number of years through writing, now and again I still have the irrational fear that it’s all just been a fluke.

What if this new editor hates what I turn in, or the marketing manager for that big name brand recoils in horror when I quote them for a project?

What if I’m actually rubbish and people just don’t want to break it to me?

How do I deal with the fear?

Just like a phobia, when something’s irrational, it can be difficult to overcome it completely. My partner is incredibly supportive (though he IS biased, obviously), and I just tell myself that if I do ever get turned down or ignored or laughed at – it’s not the end of the world!

(And of course, it isn’t).

The fear of changes in your career

The last twelve months have been momentous for me. A new home, a new relationship, a move to a new county (after all, we can work anywhere as freelance writers), and a couple of new cats.

Oh yes, and an unexpected pregnancy at nearly 40. We’re absolutely ecstatic about the pregnancy, but it’s certainly going to bring huge changes to my working life.

Why do I feel fear?

It’s like leaving the security of a job with benefits and a regular income all over again!

I look back at the friends of mine from my old job who had children, taking paid maternity leave and having the security of their jobs to go back to after that leave.

As a self-employed person in the UK I’ll be entitled to Maternity Allowance, but in terms of replacing my regular income it’s a case of if I’m not working, I’m not getting paid.

How do I deal with the fear?

I started planning as soon as I found out I was pregnant. I upped my marketing efforts, worked longer hours, and made arrangements with current clients that mean they won’t be left in the lurch while I have time off.

Since the beginning of the year I’ve taken on new clients, and I’ve been able to concentrate on higher paying projects. Probably things I should have been concentrating on anyway, but you know how easy it can be for complacency to set in!

I also regularly think of all the positives around becoming a new mom as a freelancer. The lifestyle we both have (me working from home and my partner a mature student) means that we’ll both have plenty of time at home with the baby before and after they’re born.

I can go straight from taking care of the baby to my home office, we won’t have to face the stress of one or both of us having to go back to work away from the house after the baby’s born, he can study while I’m taking care of baby, and I can work while he’s taking care of the baby.

I’d imagine there are very, very few people who go through life without any fears or anxieties getting in the way. For the rest of us it’s a case of recognising our fears without letting them take charge of our lives, and remembering our true worth.