That’s a great strategy, Devon! Super idea to promote that background in an interesting way.

See, your friend didn’t understand the first rule of attracting people — don’t talk about yourself. Talk to them about some aspect of themselves, such as nail polish or hair color or tattoos that are interesting (I’ve had long conversations with strangers over their tattoos, and I don’t have one nor want one — I like the art).

That’s great that you bring yourself out of your shyness that way.

Smoke & mirrors, Lori. I’m extremely introverted and shy by nature, so I have to force myself to say hi to people. I started doing that in high school, while standing in a long line at a book signing . I remember thinking, “I bet they’re as bored as I am.” So I asked the person ahead of me something just to start a conversation – and it worked. Once I feel comfortable with people, I’m a chatterbox. But my initial sense is always, “This person has no interest in me or what I have to say.” For work it’s easier to get past that, since there is an obvious topic to discuss.

When I’m at a check-out, I might compliment the checker on his or her glasses, or ask what color of nail polish she has on…something general and about them. Just like we need to do with potential clients. This weekend I witnessed a friend telling a 20-something checker that she was out late the night before seeing her friend’s band play. My friend was trying to present herself as a
hip chick, but the checker could not have cared less. And why should she?

All that said, yesterday I sent an LOI to a marketing agency that is based in my neighborhood. The guy who runs it replied with the hour, saying he’s a journalist so he handles most of the writing – but he liked my clips and credentials and wants to stay in touch in case anything comes up that he might need an extra writer for.

Paula, I think we’re all a bit nervous and insecure when approaching clients. We’re writers! Not salespeople! Why do we have to go through this agony??

I got some really good advice from my husband today — now that I’m sitting here with some idle time (very little, but some), maybe it’s my chance to reinvent what I want out of this business. So I’m chewing on that while trying to attract a few more clients (always trying to do that!).

I find it difficult to believe that you, The LOI Maven who taught me how to use one, has trouble with insecurity! That surprises me quite a bit because you certainly put forth an in-control persona!

And you know I’m shocked — I actually used more exclamation points in this post than I have all month. 😉

Writer’s Digest and Writer’s Market were where I learned the ins and outs of sending queries, too.

I could still use advice on attracting new clients – I’ve learned how to sell an idea, but not how to sell my skills or services. In part, it’s because I’m not a natural-born sales person, but it’s also in large part to my own insecurities and shyness.