I was reading a fun post by Maria Schneider the other day about the stupid things people say to writers. Go read the “You Get Paid For That?” post. I’ll wait….
So what was the stupidest/rudest thing someone said to you upon learning you were a writer? We’ve all heard the “Oh wow! I’ve always wanted to write a book!” response, partly because the world is full of frustrated writers. That one is almost forgivable. But what about those who say things like “Oh, how adorable.” Or “Really? So you don’t have a real job?” What’s the worst you’ve heard?
I’ve had a few responses that put my back up. Probably the absolute worst was the stereotypical British snub. We were in Italy at an event for my husband’s work. The man across from us (who was from England) was talking with my husband and they weren’t agreeeing on something scientific. The man was trying his best to put my man down, but since my man was raised in the same country, he knew how to play the game, so to speak. Having had no luck, the man turned to me, looked me in the eye and said, “And what do you do? Are you in science, as well?” I said no, I was a writer. He stared at me for two seconds, then turned to the person sitting to his right and started talking to him, never acknowledging that I’d even spoken. That, friends, is a British snub. And I love the British – much fun on a trip normally. But this particular man was everything pompous and stereotypical of, well to be fair, of anyone who has to one-up someone, British or not.
What have you been subjected to?
Whether my answer has been writing or working in theatre, there’s one response that makes me want to kill:
“No, really, what’s your REAL job?”
What I do instead is take a beat, laugh, and say, “I actually get paid to do what I love, unlike you.”
On telling someone (a Canadian, of all people!) I’m a copywriter…
“You know, you should really buckle down one of these days.”
I recently had a dispute with a banker who was in the back seat of a cab and swung his door into ongoing traffic–meaning my car! Knocked my driver’s side mirror off to the tune of $250 in damage.
I was on the phone with him trying to get him to pay for the damage. I told him that I was confident a small claims judge would see things my way and that because I was self-employed, arranging my schedule to hang out at small claims court one morning wouldn’t be a hassle.
He continued to tell me repeatedly why I was wrong and then said, “Sure, being unemployed means it’s easier for you to go to court.”
I said: I’m self-employed, not unemployed.
What I didn’t say: You pompous arsehole!
Of course, he never paid.
A “friend” said to me, when she found out I’d decided to freelance write full-time, “Great! I don’t have a job either, so we’ll have lots of time!”
Oh, I’ve gotten the British snub too, Lori, only from an Indian real estate agent here in America. ;o)
Hubby and I were looking at houses a few years back, shortly before we bought this one, and we met with a real estate agent to look at a house he had listed. He was making nosy small talk — assessing how serious we were about buying a home, I’m sure — and he asked what I do.
“I’m a writer,” I said.
He looked at me for half a second, then turned to my husband and asked, “And what do YOU do?”
Obviously he was hoping at least one of us had a “real” income. He found Michael’s potential to be greater than mine, I guess, because he chatted with him a little and didn’t say another word to me except for “Goodbye.”
I’m a copywriter. One of my friends said, “I’m so proud that one of my friends is a writer! Well, not like novels or poems or anything… “
Um, thanks??? I guess only “real” writers write books.
LOL! I love these stories!
ballywick, that’s funny! Actually, it’s irritating to you, but the stories we can tell after the fact, you know?
Katharine, that is SO funny! I had that happen recently. My car broke down. MY car. Not his. Yet the repairman talked to, and billed, him.
Oh Amanda, that’s so familiar! My friends used to call on their days off because they knew “I’d be home.” Hello! I’m WORKING! Even my mother finally got that! LOL
We call those types A-holes, Gabriella. 🙂
Amy, that’s pretty typical of what I get, too. I LOVE telling a particularly annoying person what I write. It’s as though they are too numbed by the boredom of it to find an exit. LOL
Lori, I’ve had experiences like that with mechanics simply because I’m a woman. It infuriates me. I work on my own car, a VINTAGE car I might add, and have done almost every repair that doesn’t involve taking the engine apart. So when someone talks to me about cars like I’m an idiot, I tend to get pretty peeved.
Oh, and Amanda, a very good friend of mine has been unemployed twice since I started freelancing. The first time she told me that we’d have to go to lunch periodically since, you know, neither of us had a job. The second time she knew better, but only slightly.
I’m not sure why some people are so convinced that home = unemployed. And, keep in mind, this is one of my closest friends I’m talking about! So it’s not like she doesn’t know what I do!
Katharine, I had troubles with the very people living in this house understanding that even though I could call my own hours, I was not available at all hours to accommodate them and their needs. It took putting my foot down – HARD – to get my point across. They don’t even ask now. Good thing! LOL
9 times out of 10, I answer the “what do you do for a living?” question with “copywriter” and get this blank stare, followed by “what’s a copywriter?” After clarifying that nope – I don’t work the copy machine (seriously – had a few folks connect THOSE weird dots…) and explaining what I write – sites, mail, brochures, etc, they get this glazed look – guess they were expecting Apple or Coca Cola TV spots – I wish!
LOL! Sheri, that’s a new one! I usually get “So how does someone copyright something?” which is completely different from what we do….
I tell them I write insurance articles. The blank stares are priceless.